Joanna Fortune: How can I prepare my three-year-old for arrival of new sibling? 

You cannot do much more than you already are to prepare your son, or yourself, for the change that is coming. You have clearly told him enough to keep him excited.

The concept of a baby that has yet to arrive is quite abstract for him to make more sense of beyond this excitement. His feelings may change when the baby arrives. If this happens, you must respond carefully.

Accept that it is hard to adapt to having a new baby in the house and empathise with his emotions (jealousy, frustration, sadness, or a combination), so that he feels understood by you. Keep in mind that he may also remain excited about the baby and not struggle as you anticipate he might.

I wonder how you feel about the idea that you will have another child vying for your attention, needing to connect with you, and being entirely dependent on you.

You talk about preparing your son to deal with the shock of sharing the stage, but he isn’t the one who built that stage. He is your firstborn, the one who made you a parent; and the first grandchild, making your parents grandparents. He has a special place in your family, and everyone around him has created this prime position.

It can happen that parents, or indeed grandparents, might fear that they couldn’t possibly love another child as much as they loved this first child. This is not an unusual response.

When a baby is born, your love expands and extends to include this child, just as your family circle expands to create the space for a new member. It is not that your son will be loved less; he will be loved the same and will see that his attachment network has the capacity to hold and love another child.

Utilise your extended support network when the baby arrives, so your son has time to have fun with grandparents/aunts/uncles, while you are recovering from delivery and caring for your newborn.

Ensure he has a baby doll with some nappies and accessories to mirror what he sees you doing.

And while you are feeding/changing/caring for the new baby, tell him stories about when you did these things for him.

Genius Juniors has a lovely range of books to support young children with a new baby sibling. See: geniusjuniors.ie/collections/new-baby

• If you have a question for child psychotherapist Dr Joanna Fortune, please send it to parenting@examiner.ie